...and a Happy New Year: Humility Overshadows Pride!

What is it that you crave at Christmas gatherings? Traditional ham or turkey dinners? Christmas morning breakfast? Anticipating Santa's arrival with cookies and milk? Admiring the exchange of Christmas gifts? The re-telling of the Christmas story?

We all have our favorite parts of Christmas and New Years celebrations! And sometimes, if we're not careful, we'll lose sight of those around us and place the spotlight on ourselves. Here's what I mean. Christmas is all about Jesus, Santa, or the kids. Yet, there's always somebody else who writes their name in the script and moves into the spotlight of such occasions.

We all know Ryan Seacrest holds the spotlight of Dick Clark's New Year's Bash but someone else is always seeking to become the host of their own little bash in the cul-de-sac of their small town and become the next YouTube sensation.

And so it is, the ongoing question, how do we make for a Happy New Year?

Demand less.

The Christmas story has a fascinating twist that is so counterintuitive of the expectations of society. The people wanted a leader to rise up to provide military, political, and economic success but what they received was a baby born to an unknown family in an unfamiliar way prepared to walk an unlikely path.

Mary, Joseph, the shepherds, the wise men, the innkeeper, and the rest of people in that day had no idea exactly what was taking place the night of Jesus' birth. But here is the unique twist that Christians believe happened that night. Jesus left heaven for earth. And he was on a mission that led him from the cradle to the cross.

You see, when Jesus was born, the Father knew that his siblings would be suspect of him, the Pharisees would test him, a disciple would betray him, and the soldiers would crucify him. Yet, He did not deny His responsibility to find His greatest happiness in unwavering obedience.

But look how drastically different many of our lives will be. We walk through life making demands, giving orders, placing expectations on others that they cannot uphold. No wonder so many people live miserable and frustrated lives. Never good enough for others. Never satisfied with receiving the penultimate gifts of this life.

If we truly want to be happy we must learn to demand less. Be grateful for what we have. See everything in this life as a gift. Realize that we're not as good as we think we are and most definitely not as deserving as we think we should be.

Happiness will be more opportunistic when we learn the difference between rights and responsibilities. Jesus knew the difference. He deserved His seat at the right hand of the Father but He excused Himself from His seat to fulfill a responsibility that would enable us to truly be happy, to find life in Him.

And so it is with you and me. If you want to be happy this year, make less demands. Instead of giving orders, take orders. Instead of priding yourself with being at the top, lower yourself beneath others. Be more like Jesus, who picked up a towel and basin of water, and washed the disciples' feet. He humbled Himself. Happiness always takes the path of humility over pride, every time!

...and a Happy New Year: Generosity Overshadows Greed!

If you had to choose one character to personify your Christmas experience, who would it be? Clark Griswald, Scrooge, the Grinch, Ralphie, Will Ferrell, Kevin McAllister, Tim Allen, the Kranks...

Is your Christmas experience best summed up by what you get? What you give? How about dodging weird cousin Eddie?

I can see it now. Kids' faces as they open their last gift. Looks of exasperation as if to say, "That's it? That's all it was?" Waiting 364 days for a 2 minute and 49 second moment of frenzy strolling wrapping paper across the room. But the rehearsed lines of 'Merry Christmas' and 'thank you' were completely drowned out by hearts of disappointment.

We all struggle with the frustration of setting high, albeit most likely unmet, expectations that no amount of toys, gadgets, food, or good company can meet.

And the question remains, how do we move from Merry Christmas to a Happy New Year?

Give more.

I'm not making an attempt to calculate or categorize the character of these figures, but consider the this one moment in time as the shepherds and wise men made their way to visit baby Jesus. The star was shone and the journey began. A caravan of individuals bringing gifts of extreme worth, gold, frankincense, and myrrh, clearly not expecting anything in return.

There was no sign of disappointment or exasperation. And it seems there was a sense of happiness and fulfillment provided by their offering and merely sitting around admiring the gift God had brought into the world.

We live in a fast paced world of demands reaching higher and higher for what can be accumulated, accomplished, and approved. Essentially, we live in a world that is teaching us that it is more important to consider what we can receive than what we can give.

But truth be told, our attempts to be satisfied by merely what we possess or have received is a misleading fable told by countless addicts of false happiness. The toys we own, the cars we drive, the houses where we live, the jobs we hold are all secondary to the heart desiring to be happy.

A person set in the direction of happiness must learn to give more, recognizing that what we have is meant to be dispensed in a way that generates a heart of generosity. When our heart looks like an episode of Hoarders we will never feel the freedom and happiness that generosity creates.

Generosity, our willingness to give more, requires discipline. It's not natural. It's not easy. And, at first, it's not always enjoyable. Finding happiness by giving more, thus momentarily having less, seems so counterintuitive. But it's proven to be overwhelmingly rewarding.

Here's three ideas to having a greater awareness for giving more. First, give generously. Don't be stingy with what you have. It's likely that you've been blessed beyond what you deserve so don't be afraid to freely open your hands to give what initially seems unlikely.

Next, give sacrificially. Some of us may understand the phrase "give until it hurts," but most of us have a low tolerance for financial pain. Sacrificial giving becomes a great reminder of the cost required to buy our personal, physical, spiritual freedom and happiness.

Lastly, give joyfully. Begrudging generosity isn't generosity at all. Remember that as you give your heart is being set free from your own kingdom of good works that's  collecting moths and rust.

This new year will create a happier version of yourself when you prize others as more important than yourself. And while the importance of others will spur you to let go of what you have for their sake, it's ultimately for your sake. While greed is our attempt to acquire more to be happy, generosity frees our heart to be happy by giving more. So, choose to give more and be happy!

...and a Happy New Year: Peace Overshadows Worry!

The Christmas holidays carry a weight that is paramount to almost any other time of year.

Individuals that experience the holidays for the first time without a significant member of their lives due to loss, families that experience financial strain to provide all that our children desire, and the general chaos that abounds with trying to balance work, family, and the holiday cheer.

And who could forget the most incredibly embarrassing moment we all try to avoid; wearing your tacky Christmas sweater to a non-tacky party!

So how do we successfully navigate the journey from a "Merry Christmas to a Happy New Year?"

Free your mind from worry!

In the Christmas narrative Mary and Joseph were both approached by an angel making a bold declaration of a miraculous birth. No doubt they were both shocked and in awe. Mary's response of "how can this be?" sheds light on just how quickly anxiety can begin to send one's emotions spiraling in so many different directions.

Once Mary and Joseph's nerves were settled and they listened more intently to the angel's speech they both chose to act in faith and receive the plan God had placed on their lives. Mary's humble response, "I am the Lord's servant, let it be done according to your word" seems to manifest an overwhelming peace that could only be provided to someone in complete surrender by Someone in total control.

Our lives are no different. Chaos constantly abounds. News given to us that we never would have asked for. Placed in a position to fret, worry, become anxious, and fearful. Yet, given the opportunity to simply reply "be it done according to your word" we begin to feel the weight of worry dissipate under the undeniable presence of God's peace.

Worry is simply the evidence of our doubt that God is not control. As if, by some chance, He doesn't have this. That maybe our situation has escaped Him or is beyond His control. Or maybe He doesn't have our best interest in mind.

So, in many instances, we begin to pull back the reigns, rake our chips back across the table, start devising our own plans for how we're going to make this better. And all the while, because we've been down this road before, we know that our plan will be insufficient, unsuccessful, or only provide temporary relief for the heartache heading in our direction apart from His intervention.

So, how do we gear up for a Happy New Year? Remember that God is transcendent; He's above space and time. Yet He is also imminent, ever drawing near. The Christmas story reminds us that by Jesus coming to earth there would be a new day dawning; a day when His peace would overshadow every worry in this world! Don't feel victimized or paralyzed by the fear, worry, or doubt that your circumstances create; let peace, His peace, rule your heart that you might have a Happy New Year!

...and a Happy New Year: Love Overshadows Hate!

Now that Christmas Day has come and gone and we are relishing in the new toys and gadgets we received from our favorite Santa figure, we are on to making our New Years' resolutions.

Whether this year was kind to us or one we hope will never be repeated, what can we do to ensure that this next year is a "Happy New Year?"

Free your heart from hate!

You may be inclined to say, "But I don't hate anybody or anything at the moment!" While this may be true, after some more serious reflection, I've learned not to respond so quickly.

I recently shared this thought from the Christmas story with a group of recovering addicts and individuals down on hard luck, "I think I'm more like King Herod than I really want to admit!"

Herod was the one wanting to kill baby Jesus. While the wise men and shepherds were being led by bright lights and bringing expensive gifts as an act of worship, Herod was devising a plan to ensure his kingdom would not be dismantled.

Seriously, how many of us feel our kingdoms being threatened by the presence of Jesus? Giving up this idealistic world of control, comfort, and convenience that we've harbored all to ourselves seems to be a foreign concept most of us are not willing to concede.

And because we feel our kingdoms being threatened we put up our defenses; rationalizing our own behavior and becoming judgmental toward others. And what grows out of those attitudes is envy, bitterness, and contempt that eventually leads to hate.

Now, we don't usually call it hate. We're much more refined than that. But whatever expletive you sense your heart screaming as you blunder into a heaping mess of life or stare at others as they snuggle up close to the life you've always wanted it becomes evident that it's not leading you down the path of your own happiness.

Very simply, here's my first New Year's resolution for all of us; know that love and forgiveness will rob hate of its power. Forgive yourself. You have a past. And so do I. We can't change that part of our story but we don't have to let it continue to cripple us moving forward.

Forgive others. Hurt people hurt people. We're human; imperfect people. Flailing our arms in the air screaming obscenities because life's not fair will not move us any closer to the happiness we desire.

But the essence of truth required to forgive ourselves and others is to realize that we've already been forgiven. The Christmas story isn't just about the happy experiences of Santa, family, meals, and presents. It's about that baby being born and the happy life that He would offer by establishing His forever kingdom!

No Average Joe: The Father of Jesus

He was told in a dream to retreat to a land where his ancestors were once enslaved with fear and degradation; Egypt. But why? That doesn't make any sense.

With no significant accomplishments, wealth, or titles to his name; Joseph was just a common, ordinary, Jewish laborer, a carpenter.

And while engaged to be married he found himself at odds with reason and fate. Mary was pregnant with someone else's child and according to the law he had every right to leave her, expose her, even have her stoned. Surely thoughts of betrayal, unfaithfulness, and selfishness flowed through his mind.

But there's something revealed about Joseph that can easily be missed if not read carefully. The Bible says he was a righteous man. So he decided to put her away secretly; not to expose or extinguish her. His decision was endowed with dignity and respect.

But in a moment of contemplation an angel appeared to him in a dream and declared that he not divorce her but in fact marry her, name the baby Jesus, and step into the role of becoming the step-father of the Savior of the world. And Joseph obeyed. Why? Because he was righteous. Not just a rule follower or a law abider but righteous.

Again an angel appeared to Joseph in a dream to depart from Bethlehem to Egypt to escape the evil intent of King Herod whose kingdom felt threatened by the presence of Jesus.

Twice more an angel appeared to Joseph to part ways with their current home in an effort to fulfill the Scriptures by moving from Egypt to Israel to Nazareth.

According to Matthew's Gospel that's about the extent of Joseph's involvement in the Christmas story; a righteous man being visited by an angel four times and each time, he obeyed. When his actions would have been justified to put Mary away; he chose to trust and obey. When he could have claimed a hardship on traveling to other cities, he chose to trust and obey.

Joseph, the step-father of Jesus, accepted his role in the background so the bright lights could shine all around the lead role of Jesus coming into the world. He simply did what the righteous should do; he did the right thing, at the right time, for the right reason.

How can we be more like Joseph? When life offers us opportunities to live in judgment of others' actions or fear of God's calling we must learn to be wise and choose to do what's right. It's not always easy or attractive but it always puts the focus on the greater story being told; not our story but the story of Jesus.

Important Decisions

Who should I marry? Where should I live? Where should my kids go to school? What career path should I choose? How should I invest my money? When should I retire?

These are legitimate questions that oftentimes do not provide clear cut answers. So how do we approach making important decisions like these and others?

I generally try to incorporate these three guiding principles when making significant decisions in my life; pray, weigh the pros and cons, and seek godly counsel.

Prayer signifies my dependence on the spirit of God and my desire to have the steady current of my faith fueling the decision making process. The leading voice and the highest priority of my life should be God's Word. 

Weighing the pros and cons is an attempt to assure that my decisions aren't based solely on my heart and emotions. If I know me, my emotions can become misguided and blur my vision in a way that I chase people, places, and dreams that God never intended for me to pursue.

Seeking godly counsel is simply asking for others to confirm or deny what they see as my passions and pitfalls, and how making this decision could be a wise or harmful move for me to make. I know that I need accountability in my life so that I'm not constantly choosing my own path based on preferences, conveniences, or self-gratifying results.

While many of the decisions we make aren't necessarily cut and dry, black and white decisions we must learn to seek the wisdom and discernment necessary to consider the implications of those decisions. Insightful decision making will create an awareness for us to respond more appropriately when life doesn't happen as we had planned.

Let your decisions be made with God's Word, a steady mind, and the voice of trusted friends. Making decisions isn't about following your heart; it's about following God's heart for your life. With every decision made, live like it's the right decision made at the right time for the right reason. God will honor our attempts at humble, righteous decision making with loads and loads of grace.

Ready and Willing!

"Ready or not, here I come!" 

My son loves playing hide and seek. It doesn't matter if we're in the house, outside, or at Walmart. Of course I have to remind him not to get out of sight in public places. I would hate to forfeit any "Father of the Year" honors by being called on the intercom to report to the home and garden center, register nine, or the customer service desk. 

So the counting begins. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5...When finally reaching my numerical destination,  I set out to discover him in the unique hiding place under the same pile of clothes I was in only moments before. 

But sometimes when I finish counting and recite the familiar line, "Ready or not, here I come," he begins to scream, "Dad, I'm not ready!" 

He's more than willing to play the game but he's not quite ready for the game to begin. So he says, "Dad, start over!" In his quest to find the most optimal position his indecisive spirit leaves him squandering in the dregs of open spaces.   

And this is the place I find myself with God. Willing but not quite ready! 

I'm convinced I need more time, more training, more clarity. I need one more fleece, one more burning bush, one more talking donkey. One more supernatural expression of His presence rather than just trusting the surge of His Spirit on my heart. 

I'm trapped between sitting down and taking a step. Trapped between fear and courage. Trapped between rebellion and obedience. Trapped between trusting my flesh and His spirit in me.

Here's what I hear God saying right now, "Ready or not, here I come!" Yes, there's uncertainty. Yes, I would like more time. Yes, I would like the path to be more clear. But that's what makes it a real test of faith. Taking the leap, making the jump, beginning the journey. 

God is at work and He's asking us to join Him. He's not asking if we're ready; He's simply asking us to be willing to take this leap of faith and trust Him with our steps!

Walk by faith

"Walk by faith!"

I've seen this phrase penned across coffee mugs. Written on bright colored posters hanging on the wall. I've even seen it tattooed on someone walking barefoot in the sand.

The problem is, for those of us who sing its praises, we rarely live up to its hype. Instead, we find ourselves walking by fear, compulsion, or apathy.

We treat life like we're walking on egg shells; full of fear and scared to death of our future. 

We treat life like we're driving a steam roller; domineering control of our circumstances. 

We treat life like we are running through a field of lilies; showing no regard for purpose and vision.

Life happening right or being good is not all riding on our shoulders. There can never be a "100% satisfaction guaranteed" warranty placed on this journey we're making from earth to eternity when we place that responsibility completely on ourselves.

God is fine with vision, ambition, and discernment. But when we abandon this truth, the belief that no matter what "God's got this," then we cease to walk by faith. He wants us to be wise and well prepared, not foolish. He wants us to be flexible and open minded, not stubborn or insincere. He wants us to be confident and full of courage, not timidly hiding in fear. 

But what He wants most of all is for us to surrender ourselves to His plan and trust Him with our steps. It doesn't have to be figured out and it doesn't have to be set in stone. It's simply placing our life open-handedly into His.

When the foreseeable outcome isn't evident then our awareness for faith, a confident hope in a proven God worthy of our trust, is heightened. So let your next step, whether big or small, simply be a step of faith. 

 

How Much Does it Cost?

New toys, new wardrobes, new cars, new houses. Each of these items bear an attraction, level of entertainment, comfort, and beauty that cause us to actively pursue them without much reservation.

Without question, our eyes become enlarged and our hearts pump tirelessly in anticipation of receiving these kinds of possessions. However, it seems instead of considering it's worth we resort to this question, "How much does it cost?"

Sure, that's a legitimate question. If we don't have the resources to make the purchase then we simply look with envy at those who do. And it's in that moment that we move from asking "What's it cost?" to "What's it worth?"

Jesus tells a story in the Bible about a man who found a treasure in a field. He sold everything he had to purchase the field because of the excitement that awaited his purchase. The worth of his new prize far outweighed the cost required to receive it.

Jesus is making a very simple request, "Follow Me." And we are forced to weigh in the balance the cost and the worth, the risk and the reward. And too often, the cost outweighs the worth in our misguided view of what we consider to be a full and happy life.

Don't be mistaken while this two phrase request is simple, it's not easy. Denying yourself pleasures, conveniences, and having things your own way. It's not a promise to remove the difficulties and strains of your finances or relationships. But it is a promise to have peace and joy to endure the circumstances that this life brings.

The beauty and worth of Jesus is incomparable to all that this world has to offer. Sure, financial stability, relational peace, and moments of entertainment are reassuring and relaxing but there is a level of trust to be placed in Jesus that this world cannot provide. Choose Jesus. He is more valuable than the treasure found in any field. He provides for you what no one and nothing else can; true life.

Stranger Danger

Last week was Halloween. And all the well-meaning, responsible adults who were premiering for "Parent of the Year" honors took time to instill two very important principles into their little costumed heroes, princesses, and zombies.

The night was adorned by little minions dressed in fine apparel running through neighborhoods collecting candy in their pumpkins, plastic bags, or pillow cases. And our words to them as they stepped off the edge of our flat-bed trailer hay ride or out of the side door of our mini van, "Don't forget to say thank you!"

I love what comedian Bob Smiley said about trick-or-treating. "I use this holiday as an opportunity to teach my kids about the government collections agency. When they come home, I take 50%. But just in case you think that's unfair, I am providing free healthcare."

Then, there's this other rule, sometimes spoken and other times assumed, "Don't take candy from strangers!" This reminds me of the Saturday Night Live skit with Edward Norton about the police officer making a school visit to teach proper trick-or-treat etiquette.

But why is it so essential to instill these two ideals; to say thank you and don't talk to strangers?

There's something inside of me that feels like I should violate the premise of both of these principles. That I should learn to be a giver more than a taker. That my vocabulary should include "you're welcome" more often than "thank you." That talking to strangers in an effort to close gaps and build bridges is more beneficial than staring awkwardly at people who don't look, act, or dress like me.

I'm a parent so I totally understand the need to provide safety and security for our children. So, I am not saying we send them out into a world full of wolves unguarded or unaware. But what I am saying is that it is my responsibility to teach my child to reflect the character of Jesus. That by serving others we want to see people from all walks of life connect to life in Christ.